The Long Game
On average sex lasts 11 minutes.
There is a book with the same title, it is a hot book, they have a lot of very well written hot sex.
I recommend you read it: 11 Minutes by Paulo Coelho.
Do we need the short game?
I often wonder what is all the fuss about?
This 11 minute activity takes up so much time in our brain, our hearts and let’s face it, in every single aspect of life, from your choice of outfit, to what you eat for lunch – preferably fat free, so that someone actually wants those 11 naked minutes with you.
What if we removed this? What would we be capable of if sex was off the table, if our hormones/dicks/lust filled instincts no longer ruled us? I would most likely be insanely wealthy given the amount of time I would win back.
Simply put, we would achieve so much more than what we do now.
Don’t believe me, try it, log all the minutes and hours you spend on sex related thought, pursuit and activity.
No more asking, “Do you think I am pretty?”, “Do I look good naked” or “Am I a good lover?” or “Is my dick big/thick/long enough?” for both sexes it would simply be so refreshing.
Nothing depresses me more than listening to the, you need sex for the relationship to function argument.
Really? Do we?
Are there not a million others things we could do, are there not gazillions other more significant ways to make a connection with someone? No other ways to be intimate? What happens if your man’s penis is eaten by flesh-eating bugs? That’s it then? Does love end? Are you destined to seek it elsewhere?
Don’t get me wrong I would not want to live a life without this delicious activity in it, but the extent to which we priorities sex above all else – I feel is, slowly, becoming problematic.
A world where all other forms of connection, all aspects of love and partnership are simply measured in how often you put out is not one that speaks great hope for the future of relationships and their current moral definitions and limitations.
Do I want my daughter to live in a world where she is deemed a good wife only if her husband get enough sex? Ummm…. Let me think about this fictitious example of my actually having kids, and yet still, hell no!
11 minutes, what about the 23 hours 49 other minutes of the day?
It is the New Year – and whilst Gigi is sexting with her lovers, I just wanted to give you something to think about in case you and your man are past that wildly exploitative phase. Bitcoin anyone?
I recently read an article about the need to go around all the bases every time your partner touched or kissed you and how this was killing relationships. I could not have agreed more!
Does every kiss need to lead to penis in vagina (or whatever alternative you prefer) just because you are in a relationship and have had sex before and will again!
Let’s go back and just stop at second base = the heavy petting definition.
Make out kids, you can do this for a lot longer than 11 minutes and it will make those subsequent minutes so much more valuable if sometimes you just stop at second base. Keep the anticipation alive.
For those who wish they had an 11 minute partner of any kind, let me tell you, take your goddam time!
Start looking for other ways to be intimate and I guarantee that 11 minute partner will be around a lot longer and will be ultimately far more interesting in the long term. In the end the LONG game is what really matters.