Giiirrrrrrl. I can’t.
Honey! Ok so let me start this off by saying, I understand your pain.
Now let me get to the real. He’s gay. Duh.
Listen babe, so you mean to tell me that he pursued you, felt you up, got you all hot wet and excited…and delivered nothing, nilch, nada, niete? I’m not sure all of those are actual words in any language but you get me right? No hon, classic gay. At best he was excited by the chase. I’ve been there, you know your friend gets high off the power. At worst he was trying to be a dick. Not give it to you, but freaking be an actual dick, the kind that nobody wants, just a mean old nasty shit dick. But somewhere in the middle, most likely what happened here, is that he was trying to figure out if he could be with a woman, for real. Not just a beard, someone to have around to fool the world that he actually likes pussy, but a true woman who was all of that, smart, hot and accomplished, and aim to please her. So he dipped in, played a bit, and when it came time to seal the deal, he choked.
Remember the Sex in the City episode where the two gay guys tried to have a threesome with Samantha? Some kissing rubbing and grinding later when they were face to lips with her crotch they were like “I can’t”. Bahahaaaa! That’s what happened to you girl.
I would love to boo hoo with you sweetie, but the truth is, any guy who truly deserves the “one who got away” title would NEVER just tease and flee like that. Maybe he was married, this is one of those little facts that are actually very hideable. Is hideable a word? Should be. Fuck him! Forget him.
Babe you are probably only thinking about his dumb ass because you’re bored. Honestly you should probably give your boss a taste of the goody goody to get inspired again, and leave that whack ass loser in the past.
Believe me, if his dick were memorable, he would have given it to you.
Let’s go for a drink. Soon.
Love you girl,